Am I "just" Black?
I went into a familiar Dunkin Donuts in Queens today and the woman who sees me often wanted to ask me something. She was obviously hesitant and didn't want to disrespect me. Her question was one I am familiar with, "You are very pretty. Where are you from?" My answer is rarely accepted, "I am Black. From here, I was born and raised in New York." Well this woman without trying to insult me insisted I tell her more about where my family is from because "You don't look it."
I don't look what exactly? Should I look more like a servant, more ignorant, dirty, ugly or invisible? I don't look like Oprah or anyone from BET?
Well today I didn't allow anger to rule my answers.
I graciously told her yes my people were slaves on this land, slaves that had been taken primarily from Africa and later the Islands and other parts of the world. I also insisted that, "Yes I do look like other Black American Women!" As often as I have had conversations like this they continue to disappoint, anger, frustrate and also sadden me. I am glad to report that when I told her that many people don't know the history of this country another immigrant white man (the woman is from India) concurred with me saying even people born here are not knowledgeable of the history.
I felt like she was saying I was too pretty to be "just black"! Black women are so exotic and can look like we are from ANYWHERE! What am I supposed to look like? Is her image of Black "Americans" so tainted? Why did she think it would be okay to tell me I am so pretty and follow it up by saying I don't look like my people? Okay so you all know about my 'mixed' heritage and so many of us have them, however I am a Black woman until and maybe after I die.
WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU??? This is what Dr. Joy Leary would call a teachable moment! It could have gone several ways but I am proud of the way I represented. I can always say more but for today I've had enough so YOU take it from here!
Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome...continues to take new victims daily! Make sure you see "Greener Grasses" at the Lower East Side Festival May 26. That woman could be you! Or you could be me! What will you say?
ETERNAL GRATITUDE (a special Thank You to our Ancestors that made it possible for me to be called pretty, speak my mind and buy overpriced coffee!)
UHURU
I don't look what exactly? Should I look more like a servant, more ignorant, dirty, ugly or invisible? I don't look like Oprah or anyone from BET?
Well today I didn't allow anger to rule my answers.
I graciously told her yes my people were slaves on this land, slaves that had been taken primarily from Africa and later the Islands and other parts of the world. I also insisted that, "Yes I do look like other Black American Women!" As often as I have had conversations like this they continue to disappoint, anger, frustrate and also sadden me. I am glad to report that when I told her that many people don't know the history of this country another immigrant white man (the woman is from India) concurred with me saying even people born here are not knowledgeable of the history.
I felt like she was saying I was too pretty to be "just black"! Black women are so exotic and can look like we are from ANYWHERE! What am I supposed to look like? Is her image of Black "Americans" so tainted? Why did she think it would be okay to tell me I am so pretty and follow it up by saying I don't look like my people? Okay so you all know about my 'mixed' heritage and so many of us have them, however I am a Black woman until and maybe after I die.
WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU??? This is what Dr. Joy Leary would call a teachable moment! It could have gone several ways but I am proud of the way I represented. I can always say more but for today I've had enough so YOU take it from here!
Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome...continues to take new victims daily! Make sure you see "Greener Grasses" at the Lower East Side Festival May 26. That woman could be you! Or you could be me! What will you say?
ETERNAL GRATITUDE (a special Thank You to our Ancestors that made it possible for me to be called pretty, speak my mind and buy overpriced coffee!)
UHURU
posted by Unknown at 3:00 PM
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